Sally is 40. No, I'm not obsessed with the ages of the Websters (see Get Vell Soon) - this is relevant to the episode, because Sally had a birthday party. There was karaoke in t'Rovers, which was disturbing enough because we had to put up with Kevin singing Mustang Sally, and Sally's own take on These Boots Are Made For Walking. Earlier on we'd "enjoyed" a very free interpretation of Bridge Over Troubled Water by that queen of song, Gail Platt, which was enough to straighten Art Garfunkle's hair with the sheer horror of it..In the midst of all this merry-making, who should walk in but Derek's wife? And in a state of some upsetment, too. Liz had no choice but to invite her through to t'back, where Mrs Derek sobbed that she knew that Derek was having an affair and was worried that he would leave her. He'd had affairs before, but this one was different - it was like he wanted to be caught out, hence it must be serious.
A mortified Liz put the hypothetical question, "If you knew the affair was over, would that make things alright?" Mrs Derek conceded that it might help, but how could she be convinced of such a thing? Liz tried to say that Derek had confided in her about his affair, but Mrs Derek wasn't buying that ("he doesn't tell anybody anything"), so Liz had to come clean about the whole sorry business.
I never thought I'd feel sorry for Vernon, but he's been really sweet in the last couple of days and he's going to be ever so upset when this comes out.
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